Monday, April 11, 2022

Resiliency


I have grappled with writing about civil unrest for almost 2 years. I write and review, edit and rewrite. It never quite seems to provide the impossible picture of what transpired. I need to let just this go. I need for this story to be told but also have it 2 years behind me. 


The official report contracted by the state Department of Public Safety to objectively evaluate what the state did well and did not do well, was completed in early 2022. It basically paints a picture of state and city leaders caught off guard by the civil unrest and confusion regarding who should take the lead. The report states that the chain of command structure hindered timely and effective response to the unrest, that there was a lack of clarity among participating agencies and that law enforcement agencies used different approaches to handling crowds. No surprise there!


At the end of May 2020, George Floyd was murdered about a mile from our home. There is no questioning the tragic and unnecessary death by those sworn to protect and serve. There is no arguing about the horrors of what happened. I understand that enough is enough. There were peaceful protests, a lot of anger, outraged citizens, opportunists, outside instigators and full on civil unrest. We watched as the city's leadership fumbled in disagreement with the Governor. Minneapolis City Council Members made a call to defund the police with no plan for restructuring or plan for assisting with the problems at hand. So much failure, disappointment and lack of safety.


During the civil unrest, mayhem ensued and the 3rd Precinct neighborhood businesses were looted and burned to the ground. Our once quiet enough inner city neighborhood experienced constant and unprecedented street violence. The city handed over the police station to rioters. Cars and trucks (no license plates) raced around our neighborhood streets. We built barricades in our intersections to slow vehicles down. We saw no police presence. It took way too long and many days, for the National Guard to be called in. During the period of May 27-29, 2020, days were somewhat quiet but with each nightfall came unrest, uncertainty and fear. We wondered how long this could possibly go on.  We heard every pop of the marker canisters. We had ash and burned wood chunks in our yard from nearby burned buildings. We heard every shot of the rubber bullets, the crowds of protesters, rioters, looters and marchers. We saw every trolling thug looking for any opportunity to inflict harm or destroy property. We patrolled our alleys looking for containers of flammables. We checked in with our neighbors and compared stories of fear and discontent. We saw untrained and open carry civilian patrols. We knew the police wouldn't come if called so we carried a civilian patrol number in hopes of never needing it.


But wait, there's more, because apparently the pandemic wasn't enough. The burning and looting of our neighborhood business district and the roving carjackers weren't enough. The city allowed a homeless camp to be established which grew to 400+ tents just 5 blocks from our home. Many other city parks became inhabited with tents creating additional chaos. The more services that were provided the bigger the camps grew. It turned into a huge public health hazard which brought open prostitution. assaults, rapes. drug dealing. shootings and visible heroin usage.  

I know now anything can happen anywhere because it did. For those that haven't experienced anything close to this, this is how it goes. No one comes to rescue you. No one helps you. No one understands what it is like in your once safe enough home and yard. No one calls. Opportunists were everywhere. Crime increased. The news was constant. Crimes of opportunity, street violence, murders, gang violence, carjackings, high speed chases, sirens, stabbings, muggings, home invasions and no police presence. Untrained and unorganized armed civilian patrols. No illusion of safety. No protection. No help.


At the time I thought I lacked resiliency, hope and empathy but I later came to understand survival mode and trauma. I learned about fear and uncertainty. How it effects your state of mind and your relationships with people you thought you could count on. No one escaped 2020 unscathed, that I know. We all have a different story to tell about the pandemic and our spoiled little lives. Some fared better than others. Some got to throw civil unrest into an already difficult time. We may have been all going through the pandemic, but we were most certainly not all in it together.

                                        

The summer passed and by September, three months after the civil unrest, there were still no businesses open. No grocery, library, liquor store, drug stores, gas station, credit union, bank, a favorite restaurant, post office and others boarded up, torn down or in repair. We prayed for cold weather to quell the ongoing violence. Things happened to people we know. A friend assaulted in their place of business, another carjacked. There were glimmers of hope but they were like a dangling thread hanging from a hem all poised to unravel.


I know this isn't an Instagram "life is so beautiful" post. I know people adapt because that is what we do. Resilience doesn't happen overnight. People bounce back, reinvent themselves and adapt. We made a plan. We emerged from the mucky river of 2020. We relocated to a place that is peaceful and quiet. We bought a new home in a quieter community. We sold our Minneapolis house in a millennial crazed market. We half halfheartedly welcomed 2021 with air hugs, continued uncertainty, a side of hope and probably a few extra pounds.

  • “The oak fought the wind and was broken, the willow bent when it must and survived.” 
  • ~Robert Jordan






Friday, April 8, 2022

Coming Off The Road 2020


I wrote a lot in the middle of the dismay but I never wanted to publish it because every time I read it, it all sounded so horrible. It didn't seem like it could be a part of my charmed life. With a little hindsight, I want to believe we are coming out the other side of some very dark days. So I have taken a bit of fresh look at The Before Times and broken it down. In the end, two years later, our new life is beginning to emerge.

We left for extended winter travel at the end of November 2019. That seems like a lifetime ago. We had a wonderful 5 month itinerary. We headed south to Louisiana and spent a month in a rented shotgun style house in New Orleans. What a great time that was! Good music, amazing food and friends. The new year arrived and it is fair to say that is where the dismay began to creep in.

The first thing that happened is we lost our friend Riley. He passed while we were driving across Texas headed to Big Bend National Park. We continued on in a fog of loss all across Texas. Onward through New Mexico and into Arizona where we spent some time at Karchner Cavern and just as the sun was going down I hear that my friend David had died.

By the time we headed into California we found the solace of some hot springs and the beauty of Joshua Tree. We added a story to our books of a desert rat in the engine compartment of our van and a 3am drive down a lonely road to relocate it. In other news, driving around Joshua Tree in the middle of the night is actually amazing, quiet and still. It's an alien abduction type experience for sure.

By March 2020, just as we had made it to the farthest point in our travels, the pandemic became real and we made the painful decision to abandon our adventures. We cancelled reservations and drove like a bunch of spring break kids (without the drinking), back across the country. We slept in rest stops and returned home so that we could be “safe”. Everything was closing up behind us, the regional parks, hotels, campgrounds. On the positive side we did receive refunds for all our bookings even though they were all non-refundable. A spark of humanity in uncertain times.

A few weeks after returning home, and basically in lock down, we receive the unsettling news that our Louisiana long lost brother Terry was murdered. We had just a few months earlier, spent a lovely few fun days with him and his son in Marksville Louisiana on our way to New Orleans. While I was still trying to wrap my head around not being on the road, the isolation of the pandemic crept in. We lost John Prine, from Covid. He was such a treasure and fantastic story teller. He had a profound effect on my early music leanings growing up just outside of Chicago.

Zoom became our tiny connection with the world. I became a convert to Yin Yoga every night at 9pm. Thank you to Steve Murray. You were a shining star. Yin Yoga remains a saving grace.

When I hear people complain about 2021, I think no, 2020 that was the real lousy year.

Read more: The Boneyard









Saturday, April 2, 2022

WXYG The Goat Guest DJ

WXYG, The Goat Guest DJ 04/02/22 

This station was meant for me. Album Rock. It was a sign that yes we moved to an OK place. 

So much fun. Thanks to Al Neff for being the copilot. It was so fun to make a playlist and do the show live on the air. Of course if I could do it all over again my list would be different. It's a great program and so fun to tune in each Saturday. 

You too can be a GOAT Guest DJ. Simply send us a letter telling us why you’d like to do it, and include a list of 25 songs that you think is your perfect playlist, stick it in an envelope, and send it to Al, at the station. The GOAT Guest DJ Program, exclusively on Album Rock WXYG.


Goat Guest DJ April 2, 2022

Changes -  David Bowie Hunky Dory 1971 Everything stopped when this came on at a party.He was singing about us. It amplified what was going on

 That was ____________      by ____________________ on WXYG the Goat

I'm Betz today’s GOAT GUEST DJ  

We’d like to thank Cetera Investment Services, Heller & Thyen Law Firm and Lily’s Wings Burgers and Things for sponsoring the program and helping to keep the goat heard.

important early influences -
amazing grace coffee house on campus of Northwestern University - counterculture Chicago Folk Scene, TRIAD radio underground station - King Crimson, Hawkwind, John McLaughlin, the Aragon Ballroom - Albert King, Paul Butterfield and the fantastic Mike Bloomfield 
 
That’s the Way the World Goes Round - John Prine 1971 
Somebody Else's Troubles - Steve Goodman
Born in Chicago - Paul Butterfield Blues Band w Mike Bloomfield 1965



Because the Night - Patti Smith 1978 

Absolutely fascinated by Patti Smith and her story. Her life with Robert Mapplethorpe began as a love story and ended as a eulogy. The young artists, inspired together in the late 60’s in New York City. They made art together. Mapplethorpe encouraged her to sing. He is best known for his photography, powerful, black and white portraits. Smith, a poet, singer, writer and artist became an influential figure in the early punk rock scene. They remained friends until his death from complications from HIV/Aids in 1989. Women in rock were so lacking in power and Patti Smith was amazing and trans-formative. The collaboration with Springsteen, epic really.   

 

Spirits in the Night - Bruce Springsteen 1976 Great powerful story teller. A National Treasure


Locomotive Breath Jethro Tull 1971  best rock flute solo ever hear the pistons scraping 

 

Powderfinger - Neil Young 1972


Imagine - John Lennon 1971 Big impact on my life being opposed to the Viet Nam War. This song is about injustice and inequality…Imagine… a world where there is peace and acceptance of everyone. 

1980 early days I remember where I was. I was at the beginning of my career  

 

I’d Love to Change the World - Alvin Lee 10 Years After 1971 Guitar Gods moody  

 

Bridge of Sighs - Robin Trower (guitar god) (James Dewar vocals) 1975 Guitar Gods


These Days - Jackson Brown For Everyman 1973  How did he write this when he was just 16?. So heartfelt…always fresh. I was at a  music festival in San Francisco I think in 2018 and I sat in the tall trees. He was playing solo piano. It was cathartic


The Rain Song - Led Zeppelin 1973 Jimmy Page wrote it but the brilliance to me  is always Robert Plant’s vocals. Houses of the Holy establish, inspired and spurred the imagination.   

 

Green River - Creedence Clearwater 1969 That iconic hook. Call and response. Fogerty is brilliant. He wrote, sang, played lead and produced most of their songs. 


Paint it Black - Rolling Stones  It’s 2013 and I am in Hyde Park in London. People are milling about and someone tries to sell us Stones Tickets. We are like WHAT? Turns out the Stone were playing later that day. We returned later with our picnic dinner and joined hundreds of people outside the walls of the concert. Perfect sound, amazing crowd.  


Room to Move - John Mayal    Hard harmonica


Samba Pa Ti - Santana 1970 Guitar Gods


Little Wing - Derek and the Dominos Clapton and Duane Allman Guitar Gods Best version ever. 

Duane Allman died 1971 motorcycle accident. Derek and the Dominos. Played on Layla with Clapton. Finest guitarists. Muscle Shoals session work 22 years old 1968. Muscle Shoals Fame Studio.


Recognize people in my life and concluding statements

I want to thank my husband Lyle Johnson for “buying the ticket and taking the ride”, and all the people here and gone that encouraged me to live a creative life, travel, sing, make art and share stories. They are all my true inspirations. Thanks to the Goat. This was an absolute blast!


Ending Song

A Song for You - Leon Russell 1970 Stunningly beautiful. Hauntingly heartfelt composition.


Alternative songs

Anything from Pink Floyd  David Gilmour is a guitar god

Anything from the Allman Brothers

Oh Well, Peter Green Fleetwood Mac 1969 Guitar Gods

Wooden Ships - Crosby Stills Nash & Young 1969  No Nukes! 

For What it’s Worth - Buffalo Springfield 1966 It just works


 

 

Tuesday, March 15, 2022

Revamp

Big Sur 20"x20" acrylic on canvas
B.Steichen 2021

Like so many other things during the pandemic, the Just1Backpack Blog has fallen by the wayside. Lots of reasons really. The past two years have been crazy times for everyone. Blame the lack of content on the pandemic and the dystopian times we have been witnessing. There just hasn’t been much to write about that wasn't disturbing (the Civil Unrest 2020), mundane (setting up a new home), stories filled with general dismay (the pandemic) or grief for lost loved ones. Travel opportunities fallen by the wayside, but I am hopeful we have turned the corner on that. It's time to get back to living a creative life with more travels, adventures, stories, music and art. We miss our friends and hope there will be safe and fun gatherings coming up soon.  

Check out the revamped website that includes a new header name, Half Way to Anywhere. It just makes more sense to me right now. It includes old stories, recent art works, updated photographs and a store.
Things are starting to come together. How many times have I said that? There are more stories to tell, travels to experience and art to make. As always, stay tuned.





Monday, July 13, 2020

The Boneyard - Where the Memories Live


Tree of Life
What a strange and wonderful time on the road this past winter with visits to many beautiful and amazing sights, all juxtaposed to the loss of some very memorable and special people. We returned home from travels 6 weeks early to be in the “safety” of our own home. At the end of May we experienced civil unrest here in Minneapolis, resulting in the destruction of our neighborhood businesses. The unrest was triggered by the trauma of another senseless murder of a black man by the hands of men sworn to protect and serve. It appears that some days there is a lot to mourn, lost adventures, friends and connections. There is too much introspection and too much uncertainty. The emotions come in waves. We hope it all balances out. 

I have only seen a small smattering of friends since November due to our winter travels. The Covid-19 has isolated us even more. It’s been a big uncertain and disturbing blur since we returned. I have had plenty of time to think, write, paint, garden, read, dream and hope. As I struggle to weave these little stories of life and loss together, I have repeatedly hesitated to publish this writing because it is so lovingly personal. To publish, seems like the final goodbye, it makes it all painstakingly real, but it had to be written. It had to get thrown out there with all the other little stories. All of our tears are real! 

Riley Burns - Boat Captain, World Traveler

Riley Burns
Riley died in January, when we were on the road trying to escape winter. We found out while staying in a dreary hotel room just outside of San Antonio. We were on our way to Big Bend National Park. 

This was never going to end well. We all knew that. Riley uprooted himself from Alaska and returned to rural Minnesota to be treated at the Mayo Clinic. He could not have had a better care team but the odds were completely stacked against him. We spent time together, met the care team, shared meals and checked in with his siblings. It was some kind of a crazy balance of hope vs prognosis. When it came time to leave for winter, Riley wanted us to go. He was so very brave. His public persona during all this strife will always amaze me. 

After he passed, I would wake up in the middle of the night trying to remember what he looked like when he was healthy. I wanted to know if he knew how his illness infected our hearts. I wondered if he knew how scared we were for him as we tried to comfort him and understand the pain. I know he is released from all that now but I mourn the lost adventures he will never have, that little bit of hope he had to return to his home in Alaska. I mourn for the friendship that is no longer there. 

The brightest star followed us on our westward travels and I like to think that it was telling us that he was OK. We carried our memories and told stories all across Texas. Riley would have loved every gorgeous bit of scenery and every rugged mile. The Big Bend National Park helped our spirits. Riley would have loved it there, big and expansive like Alaska.

R.I.P. Riley Burns, July 3, 1965 - January 13, 2020. We miss you. 

David Bradley - Imagination is Everything

David Bradley
David died on February 16, while we were on the road in Arizona. Social media is odd that way. We find out of a person’s passing and get to read all the shared stories, all while watching a beautiful sunset among the Whetstone Mountains in South Eastern Arizona.  I know David was a “city” guy but as a photographer he would have absolutely fallen in love with the changing light. 

He was the first person I met right after I retired in 2013. We met at Jazz Fest in St. Paul and ran into each other again on the following days for more Jazz Festival events. He was kind with such a beautiful and infectious bright smile. I said something about having just retired and feeling guilty for no longer having to work. He reminded me rather sternly that I deserved the benefits of retirement and that I had indeed worked and sacrificed for every penny that comes to me each month. He probably never knew how his words stuck with me. He was right and I have carried those words with me on through this Third Act of my life.

We shared a love for jazz and his photographs of musicians were amazing. I admired his frankness and honesty about his struggles with PTSD from his service in Vietnam. I think it taught people and reminded them to never forget the sacrifice of those that served our country. We never actually saw each other again but we shared a few stories occasionally about music or traveling, corresponding via email or Facebook. We checked in on each other casually from time to time. I am sorry that David did not get to enjoy more days but I am happy he is no longer struggling. He deserved more, that I know. 

 R.I.P David Bradley, June 10, 1950 - February 16, 2020

Terry Dupuy - Laissez les bons temps rouler

Terry DuPuy
We met Terry quite by accident in 2015 in St. Martinsville, Louisiana while eating lunch at a restaurant near his old sound studio. Terry and Lyle bear a resemblance and we joked about them being twins or cousins. We occasionally over the years made contact via social media chatting mostly about cooking or music. While planning our winter travels last fall, we asked Terry if he would like to visit with us when we passed through on our way to New Orleans. He was excited about it so we made a plan for early and stopped in Marksville in early December. We visited for two days, stayed at a nearby RV camp, met his son, shared dinner, walked around town, attended the tree lighting ceremony and told stories. It gave us a little chance to get to know each other. 

We are extremely grateful for his hospitality and it seemed like we all had a good time. We brought them home canned goods from our family garden, a very mid-western thing. I am a painter and had made Terry a small abstract painting of a Louisiana cypress grove, which he immediately put up on the wall. Terry told stories. We listened. Terry seemed to have a great attitude of just letting things roll. He was excited that we were there and took us around town to meet people and see this slice of Americana.  We had no idea of the turmoil or strife they were experiencing alone and together.

In mid April, we heard of the deaths of Terry and his son Eden via social media. We thought that perhaps they had been in an accident driving somewhere for the Easter holiday.  Within a day or two we found out that Terry was murdered by his son, Eden who then in-turn took his own life. The intimate details will remain unknown to us.Terry was my go to guy to call for making the Gumbo and I know that forever, red beans and rice will never be the same.

R.I.P Terry Dupuy, August 26, 1969 - April 12, 2020 


" Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pour through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy."

- Eskimo Proverb